Damian Lillard on Leading with Love
Don't get jealous. Get happy.
ESPN posted this interview with Portland Trail Blazer guards Damian Lillard and C.J. McCollum.
I loved this exchange between the reporter, Chris Haynes (CH), and Damian:
CH: Dame, most players, you know, they see somebody [C.J. in this case] possibly can take minutes away from them, they wouldn't be as encouraging or forthcoming with help and advice. Why did you feel like you needed to do that in that situation?
DL: For me, I'm 100 percent confident in what I can do. And I know that in this league if you really wanna win, you're gonna need other good players. You're gonna need people that can dominate a game just like you can dominate a game. But I knew that it didn't take away who I am or what I bring to a team ... I don't get jealous of other people's success. You know, I get happy for 'em.
You can either lead with love or fear. I think that truly leading with love, like Lillard, requires "100 percent confidence" in yourself. Or at least 80%, so long as that 80% includes the ability to push away the instinct to act out of fear when that feeling arises.
If you're not confident in yourself, then it's a lot more tempting to be fearful of people around you, and how their actions might affect you.
Lillard leads with love: He is forthcoming with help and advice, even when the person who he is advising plays the same position as him, and can potentially take minutes away from him. In the NBA minutes = income, which speaks to the depth of Lillard's commitment.
Leading with love also helps Lillard stay focused on the larger goal. It's not about Damian Lillard, it's about winning, and he knows that "if you really wanna win, you're gonna need other good players. You're gonna need people that can dominate a game just like you can dominate a game."
True in basketball. True in families. True in relationships. And of course true at work.
A players recruit, hire, and develop other A players so that the whole team will flourish. B players hire C players and ignore their development so that they don't feel threatened.
Which direction sounds like a winning strategy?
If you're confident in what you do, you will lead with love, rather fear.
So how do you get that confidence? That's beyond the scope of this little post, but here's one thing to keep in mind: I think confidence leading to love might also work in reverse. In other words, if you lead with love, then people will recognize and respect that, and you will become more indispensable, and that will build your confidence. And it will become a virtuous cycle.
Finally, a key part of leading with love is the last part of Dame's quote: "I don't get jealous of other people's success. You know, I get happy for 'em."
So next time someone around you does good, get happy for 'em, and make sure they know about it.
Photo credit: Sam Forencich/NBAE via Getty Images
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